So the fictional character gets upset. Maybe she broke up with her significant other, so she takes her diamond engagement ring and throws it into the ocean. This is supposed to signify the fact that she is now free.

Or she wants to get a guy off the phone with his work, so she tosses the phone out the window, where it flies and breaks into pieces when it hits the ground. This is supposed to signify the fact that there are more important things than work in this world, especially when you're with your family.

Or a guy is so enraged by what he sees on television that he throws a large object at it, breaking the television. This is supposed to signify that...he is really pissed, I'd assume.

This writing device drives me nuts. It's so unnecessary. You don't throw an expensive diamond ring into the ocean for the fishes. You sell that diamond ring and give yourself a vacation or luxury trips to the spa.

You don't throw away someone's phone. How rude is that? What kind of neurotic person takes another's expensive electronic device and ruins it? Plus there's the obvious fact that work isn't the only reason for a phone.

If you don't want the phone used, just take the battery out and hide it. Ruining a phone serves no purpose. That stuff costs money, especially the ritzy phone of a guy who works a lot.

I think it would hurt inside to see a fictional character throw an iPhone out the window. I've not seen it yet, but it's probably in the works somewhere.

And why would you ruin your own television, which probably cost you hundreds of dollars? Turn off the tv or change channels! It's not that difficult. There are buttons.

To be fair, though, I can think of a couple times when the TV destruction writing twist was managed effectively. The most recent example in my memory is in BBC's miniseries Jekyll. I remember thinking, "Wow, I actually understand why he wrecked the tv." It was a mind game between himself and his alter-ego, Hyde. When it's a mind game (or, let's say, supernatural forces which keep the tv on even when it's turned off), then it becomes more acceptable.

But if the character is upset by things people say about him on television, or if his favorite team lost and he had an irresponsibly huge bet on the game, or any other matter that can be solved by just changing the channel or turning the tv off, then the character has completely lost me when he destroys the tv.

Writing devices like these are guaranteed to remind me that what I'm seeing or reading is fake, because they're entirely impractical in 'real life.' Well, at least from what I've experienced. I'm sure someone somewhere throws other people's phones out windows or into lakes. And I want them nowhere near me, please.

I dunno; has anyone you've known ever done something like this? Ruined an expensive electronic device or thrown away something worth lots of money that could be pawned? What goes through your mind when you see this stuff happening in fiction?

I don't think I've mentioned it here, but I've never had writer's block—actually, I thought it was something made up for movies and fictional books until I was about sixteen. Ideas always insinuated their way into my notice, so for years I wrote about ten stories at once, and thus satisfied my muse by multi-tasking.

When I finally decided last year to focus all energies to one novel, I chose one of the ideas I'd spent barely any time writing. Devil in Disguise contained the plot that drew me in the most.

For years, I'd envisioned a woman dancing happily at a masquerade, all of a sudden getting the rug pulled out from under her (metaphorically speaking) when she discovered her dance partner's identity: "Gah—not him!" as she finds the man she's so enjoying is the one she refused to marry years ago. This plot above all others was the one I wanted to read as a finished novel.

Now that I'm almost finished with it, I'm so glad I chose it. With my overactive muse, though, there's always another story poking at my brain, insisting to be written. My second planned novel has acted the impatient heir, plopping itself down in my consciousness. It rudely sits in close proximity, waiting for its benefactor to be carried to the next world, where finished novels go (hopefully one calls this land 'published fiction').

I've scribbled down the bits and pieces it's sent me, but I keep reigning it back as I do so. "You have no more patience than a two-year-old," I lecture Novel Number Two. "Learn your place." I shouldn't be surprised that something out of my imagination demands to be heard; the apple doesn't fall far from the writer. Which is good, 'cause I like apples. It'll have its day.

PS: It's been a bit since my last post because I've been writing up a storm, endeavoring to finish Devil in Disguise very soon. Here's hoping!

Oh, better far to live and die
Under the brave black flag I fly
Than play a sanctimonious part
With a pirate head and a pirate heart.

My favorite opera is Pirates of Penzance by Gilbert and Sullivan. The pirates could have made their way on land, with more security and more immediate respectability, but they would have been doing it "with a pirate head and a pirate heart."

When I heard those lyrics for the first time, my immediate reaction was, "Me too." I've never been able to dismiss the urge to write for my career. Last year, I decided to make it happen.

I'm almost done with Devil in Disguise, my first romance novel. Within the next six weeks, it should be completed. Also coming soon: website with excerpt.

Stay tuned. Welcome to my writing blog, where we practice piracy.